Sunday, February 25, 2007

And The Winner Is

Ms. New Beauty normally doesn't watch award shows. She normally doesn't even watch the red carpet. The only thing she cares about is what the stars are wearing, and that is so much easier to just look up on the internet. But, since none other than Andre Leon Talley was taking part in the awards by hosting the Academy Awards red carpet pre-show, MNB just had to tune in and watch the arrivals. Oh, she had her heart set on someone showing up dressed like a rainbow or a shrub, but she was actually pleasantly surprised. The stars came out tonight in beautiful dresses, dripping in jewels, and with their hair and makeup expertly done. But, while Ms. New Beauty liked almost everything she saw, there were a few missteps and disappointments. And of course, we start with the worst first, because watching people make mistakes is so much more interesting than watching them get it right.

Worst Dresses

Cameron Diaz in Valentino

Cammy, Cammy, Cammy. Why? We know that your breakup with JT is hitting you hard. But the way that you deal with that is not by trying to show him what you would have looked like as a bride had he actually proposed. Please go back to that funny, irreverant, stylish girl we've all grown to love.

Kirsten Dunst in Chanel

Ugh. This dress just looks like bedrobe meets flapper meets Miss Hannigan from Annie. And, the hair is just too undone, like the way you pull your hair back yourself after a day at the beach.

Anne Hathaway in Valentino

Pretty girl, but that big bow just does nothing for this dress or her figure. She looks like she has the shape of a cracker, just straight and boxy, no waist whatsoever. And, since I'm sure she's probably 5 foot 8 and weighs only 105 pounds, it's pretty hard to mess up her figure. But this dress has done it. I did however like all the different bracelets she stacked on, just not with this dress.

Worst Hair

Jennifer Lopez in Marchesa

The Marchesa gown is gorgeous. A little heavy on the rocks, but who else can pull that off but Jenny from the Block? The makeup is flawless. But the hair? The hair is curled way too tight and makes La Lopez look just a little matronly. And, Ken Paves was her stylist for the awards. Now that you know that, can't you just almost see one the tracks from his clip in extensions?

Not Quite Feeling It

Beyonce in Armani

Well, this dress is a huge step-up from that glittering Elie Saab number she wore at the Globes, so Beyonce deserves a round of applause for that fact alone. But, something about this dress just doesn't quite work for me. I really can't put it into words, but I'm positive that it has something to do with the stone strap, the high slit, or some combination of the two.

Jada Pinkett Smith in Carolina Herrerra

Jada always wears color beautifully. But something about this dress was just a tad too stiff for me. The fabric and the pleating at the skirt seemed more appropriate for upholstery than the petite figure of Mrs. Smith. But the boys look adorable as always. I just love the Smith family!

Just One Thing Wrong

Jennifer Hudson in Oscar de la Renta

Know that old saying about stopping in the mirror and taking one thing off before you leave the house? Somebody needs to tell the fabulous Ms. Hudson about that. The chocolate Oscar de la Renta gown is draped beautifully and works wonders for her figure. But that metallic jacket is just unnecessary. She really should have left that sucker hanging by her front door. Even if it is a little breezy in Hollywood tonight, she should have just braved the cold. But I am elated that she won the award.

Most Improved

Rinko Kikuchi in Chanel

Rinko Kikuchi finally got it right. The Chanel Couture dress she wore to the Globes got lambasted by the fashion critics. I thought the dress was beautiful, but inappropriate for the event. Tonight, Rinko showed everyone that she can pull it together for her big night out.

Best Use of Color

Nicole Kidman

Jessica Biel in Oscar de la Renta

Simply. Beautiful.

Best Dresses

Gwyneth Paltrow in Zac Posen

Queen Latifah in Carmen Marc Valvo

Cate Blanchett in Armani Prive

Reese Witherspoon in Nina Ricci.

(Sidenote - Cameron, this is how you stick it to your ex after a breakup.)

And, finally . . .

Ms. New Beauty's Pick for Best of the Night

Penenlope Cruz in Versace

Perfection. The Hair. The Jewelry. The Makeup. Perfection!

Be glamorous, walk your own red carpet every day of your life, and don't forget that Ms. New Beauty told you!


Janice said...

Reese was my favorite. Hmmmm.... Have u ever considered becoming a stylist?? LOL, I would TOTALLY hire u for a couple of events....

Ms. New Beauty said...

I thought about it briefly, because the truth is, I really only like my sense of style. You'd have to wear what I want you to wear. LOL

The Ghetto Fashionista said...

I totally agree with your red carpet assesment... what in the world was j-lo thinking with that hair? I just wanted to comb some of those curls out :) and create soft waves... Unfortunately, I had J-hud on my worst dressed list. I could not even see the beauty of the dress because of that hideous metallic jacket.

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